Condoms for Safer Sex

Always Use Your..."Condom Sense"

woman with condom behind her back

Show your savvy and play it safe during sex with a condom. Be sure you always have safer sex and use responsible birth control.

Always use protection for any sexual activity unless you and your partner have both been tested and are STD-free.

It's not slutty to have your own's the smart thing...the only do. No love!

Sharing sex toys puts you at risk for Chlamydia...Gonorrhea... Hepatitis B...HPV...Syphilis. Use a condom over a toy you insert for easy cleanup.

You can put a condom on in 12 easy steps.

Solutions to the Top 4 Complaints About
Sex with a Condom

Always have protection with you...and by the bed. Keep them everywhere and you'll be ready for sex with a condom. Don't take any chances. Don't be his STD test. Even if he has had a're not just sleeping with your partner when you have unprotected sex…you're having sex with everyone he's slept with, and so on.

Unless you are monogamous and have both recently tested negative for HIV and other STDs...always use protection! You have heard this before...but it is too important to forget:

"Correct and consistent use of condoms during sexual intercourse greatly reduces the risk of an unwanted pregnancy and/or sexually transmitted infection. Prophylactics are the only birth control products that also help protect against HIV."

Place protection within easy reach before you and your man get busy so you won't have to send a search party for your prophylactics in the heat of the moment.



It is important to use lubrication and reapply it during sex with a condom to avoid irritation and increase pleasure.

Many condoms are lubricated with silicone...a few have a water-based lubricant...and some are not lubricated at all. You may have to reapply the lube because the lubed ones dry out after five minutes or so of sex with a condom.

Lubrication helps to make condoms easier to put on. Lubrication during sex with a condom is more comfortable and pleasurable.

It can also help prevent breakage.

I don't recommend a spermicidal lubricant because they often contain Nonoxynol-9 and that can cause irritation in the vagina.

Spermicide isn't a highly effective birth control method and it doesn't offer protection from STDs.

Spermicide is also unpleasant in your mouth during oral sex with a condom. I prefer the non-lubricated ones for oral sex, anyway.

Don't use any oil based lubricants such as oil...or body lotion...with latex. Oil based lubricants can break down the latex and cause it to break. Oil-based products can also increase the likelihood of getting a vaginal infection. Oil-based lubes aren't ever a good idea to use.

Use flavored condoms only for oral sex...not for vaginal intercourse. The flavored lubricant powder can give you a yeast infection or bacterial vaginosis during sex with a condom.

The Thinnest Latex Condom

Latex condoms are the most popular type of condom.

The thinnest latex available is the Kimono MicroThin Ultra Thin.

photo of Kimono brand condom Kimono MicroThin Ultra Thin Condoms...

Leaving Latex Lacking... Polyurethane

A small number of people have an allergic reaction to latex and can use polyurethane instead.

The polyurethane condoms are only about half as thick as the latex ones.

Compared to latex condoms...the polyurethane ones are less elastic and more loosely fitting. This makes them slightly more likely to break or slip off. Using lubrication and being a little less enthusiastic with movement may help to prevent this. Some people have found them to be a bit noisy during thrusting...but I haven't found that to be the case.

Polyurethane can be used with water-based or silicone lubes.

photo of Trojan Supra polyurethane condoms

One polyurethane I like is Trojan Supra Polyurethane. Polyurethane condoms are much thinner than standard latex condoms. They are also made a bit larger.

Unlike latex...polyurethane doesn't the larger size is in part to prevent breakage during sex with a condom.

Polyurethane transmits heat better than latex so it enhances sensitivity.

A New Age Material...Polyisoprene

Polyisoprene is even thinner than any latex available today.

Many men say wearing polyisoprene protection is the most like wearing nothing at all.

Compared to polyurethane...polyisoprene is...
photo of Durex Avanti Bare polyisoprene condoms

Polyisoprene condoms are not as thin as polyurethane...but in most cases they will fit even better.

One polyisoprene I like is Durex Avanti Bare. Or, you can try Lifestyles Skyn. Avanti Polyurethane is twice as thin and strong as a latex condom. They are lubricated but have no taste.

This is the widest condom available and one of the shortest (flared at the end...snugger at the base).

Buying Basics

Don't get embarrassed when you buy protection. It shows that you are responsible and confident. It is also easy to shop discreetly online.

Most people spend only seven seconds choosing a condom... according to data from Trojan.

Prophylactics come in a variety of sizes from Snugger fit to Magnum. But on the average…they are 7.5 inches long, 2 inches wide at the shaft and a little more than 2 inches wide at the head. You should be able to unroll it completely for comfort and effective use.

For more details see Condom Sizing...Because Size DOES Matter.

Size matters. The right fit completely changes how a man experiences sex with a condom.

A condom that is too tight...

Quick sizing test...If you can't roll the condom all the way down to the base of his's not large enough.

Most condoms are made to fit men who are within the average range when erect...about four to seven inches. If it doesn't cover his entire shaft...or if he complains that it feels too snug...try those specifically made for well-endowed men.

But an oversize one can slip off...and the extra material can make your man feel inadequate.

Though the standard size of prophylactics is about 7 inches long...the length can vary up to an inch and girth sizes also experiment with brands and styles to find a perfect fit.

No matter what style condom you choose...leave some extra space at the tip of the condom to give room for the semen to collect after ejaculation.

The trick to leaving enough room at the tip of a condom...Pinch the tip of the condom between two fingers with one hand as you place it on the head of his penis. Continue holding on to it as you roll the condom down over his shaft with your other hand.

Try one designed with a bulb at the end of'll say so on the box...usually with a word like twist or pleasure or spiral. These models fit securely around the base of his shaft while creating more friction near the nerve-packed head of his penis.

If a condom is used shouldn't matter how active your sex is.

Breakage can result from...

Pleasure-Maxing Moves During
Sex with a Condom

A condom needn't come between you...him...and an orgasm.

Increase the intensity of your man's sensation during sex with a condom by...
  1. Contracting your Kegel (PC) muscles.

  2. Using the positions I recommend for deeper penetration and more friction.

  3. Squeezing your legs together in missionary or doggie-style to create extra pressure.

  4. Making a V with your pointer and middle fingers...then placing it between your legs. Press against the base of his penis as he thrusts. This gives him more stimulation where the condom is tightest.

  5. Using a vibrating cock ring. Place the ring around the base of the condom.

Keep it Hard

Some men find that they start to lose their erection when they put on a condom. If you try to put on a condom before a man has a complete erection...the pressure from the condom can prevent having enough blood filling the penis for a good erection.

But once a man has an erection...this pressure does not affect the hardness of the erection.

Condom Talk...Don't Let Him Pussyfoot Around It

The STD conversation is one every woman has to learn to handle.

Talk with your man about using a condom before having sex. It removes anxiety and embarrassment. Knowing where you both stand before the passion starts will make you more confident knowing that you both agree about sex with a condom for protection.

If you are afraid to tell him you will only have sex with a condom...then you aren't ready to have sex with him.

The kind of man who can't have an open and honest conversation with you about safe sex and birth control can't communicate honestly about anything else sexual, either.

If he refuses to have sex with a condom...then you don't really matter to him. Only his own pleasure matters to him. No matter how sexy a man seems...if he can't discuss and have sex with a condom...he's not a worthy sexual partner. You need to just walk away.

Unless you and your man are monogamous and have already tested negative for all diseases...visit your health-care provider for a thorough screening.

Even if your man seems totally trustworthy and assures you he's clean... it's perfectly legit to request those test results on paper. Of need to be prepared to pony up your own results as well.

Answers to the Top 10 Excuses for Not Wearing a Condom

If he is hesitant to have sex with a are some answers to some common excuses...

Excuse #1:

"Don't you trust me?"


"Trust isn't the point…people can have infections without even realizing it."

Excuse #2:

"It doesn't feel as good with one."


"I'll feel more I can make it better for you."

Excuse #3:

"I don't stay hard when I put on a condom."


"I'll help you put it on and that will help you stay hard."

Excuse #4:

"I don't feel as much when I wear one."


"Maybe this way you'll last even longer and that will make up for it."

Excuse #5:

"I don't have one with me."


"I do."

Excuse #6:

"I don't have anything."


"I'd like to use it anyway. It will help to protect us from infections we may not realize we have."

Excuse #7:

"Putting it on interrupts everything."


"Not if I help put it on."

Excuse #8:

"I will pull out in time."


"Women can get pregnant and get STDs from pre-ejaculate."

Excuse #9:

"But I love you."


"Then you'll help us to protect ourselves."

Excuse #10:

"But it's just this once."


"Once is all it takes."

If you are new to putting a condom on a man you can find help here. Or if you are feeling more daring... Putting on a Condom with Your Mouth...the Eroticism of Safer Sex.

Living With Herpes

Herpes virus causes cold sores and genital herpes. There is little difference between them except for location.

It's nasty looking...painful...and incurable. It may show no visible signs even while infectious.

Any type of genital...oral...or skin-to-skin contact with the virus may transmit herpes.

A partner with oral herpes may transmit herpes to a partner's genitals while performing oral sex. And a person with genital herpes may transmit the virus to a partner who performs oral sex on them.

Nearly 20 percent of Americans carry the virus for genital herpes and 50 to 80 percent carry the virus for oral herpes. Two-thirds of those with herpes carry the virus and never know it.

Condoms and dental dams offer some protection against herpes... but they only protect the area they cover.

The Most Common STD

80% of sexually active people will get HPV at some point in their lives. It is spread through vaginal or anal sex. There are many types of HPV. Most people who have genital HPV don't even know they have it because there are no symptoms. And it often goes away by itself without causing any health problems. But if you have can transmit it.

When symptoms occur...they usually occur in the form of flat or raised warts on or around the male or female genitals, anus, or cervix. If the warts grow too large they may have to be removed by a doctor. Some forms of HPV don't cause warts.

The cervix is the most common area HPV affects. If undetected...some types of HPV can cause cervical cancer. There is a vaccine available. Women can be tested for the presence of the virus...but men can't. Men often don't know they have it and pass it on to their partner.

Dental Dams for Oral Sex

Dental dams are used to help reduce the risk of sexually transmitted diseases during oral sex. They act as a barrier to vaginal and anal secretions that may contain bacteria and viruses.

They're very thin...yet reliable and strong. Your partner gets stimulation while you both remain highly protected during sex with a condom or dental dam. Use a lube on both sides of a dental dam.

You can make a dental dam from a condom by cutting off the tip and slitting it up the side. Only use a dental dam once... don't reuse or flip them over to the other side.

Always use your condom sense to keep yourself safer. No sex is worth taking unnecessary risks.

Don't miss Recommended Condoms for Fellatio.

Discover more secrets of super sex...

Return to Top of Page.