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Lubrication to Keep Sex Running Smoothly
November 24, 2015

Lubrication to
Keep Sex Running Smoothly

Some Like it Hot...But All Like it Wet

The best lubes..."personal lubricants"...have the power to enhance sensations and open up new sexual possibilities.

photo of a sexy couple

Whether you are playing solo or with your man..the best lubes may let you play...

  • Longer.
  • With more pleasure.
  • In new with sex toys...or to explore anal play.

Sex...whether with your better when it is well lubricated. Vaginal dryness can definitely ruin your enjoyment.

And just like proper lubrication makes an engine last longer...the best lubes can help sex last longer.

The best lubes don't just prevent sex from hurting. When you're wet...he can thrust continuously. And it's easier for him to vary the speed and rhythm for you to orgasm when you are well lubricated.

Psychologically...vaginal dryness can have an even more negative effect on his confidence. While a man may know that a woman's wetness has nothing to do with his sexual prowess... subconsciously he still may think he's not good enough in bed to arouse her. The best lubes let your man forget about that fear.

2 Things You May Not Know About Lubrication in a Woman

1. A woman may reach orgasm without having natural lubrication.

2. A woman may be highly aroused...yet not necessarily well lubricated.

That doesn't mean that a woman isn't physically or emotionally excited. Just use a water-based lube to get things started...or to replace...her own natural lubrication.

5 Signs of Arousal in a Woman

Visible signs of arousal in a woman may include...

  • An increase in the pace of her breathing.
  • An increase in body temperature and heart rate.
  • A high state of tension in her muscles.
  • A tightening of the abdominal muscles.
  • A throbbing of her pelvic muscles.

Sexual arousal causes natural lubrication of the vagina when blood flow increases. This natural lubrication is mainly produced around the opening of the vagina. It is slippery enough that it can be spread to the inner vaginal wall as well as over the lips and even up to the clitoris.

Lubricate to Keep Things Running Smoothly

61% of women sometimes have trouble getting wet enough for sex...even when they're completely turned on.

Think about the hottest days of summer...when you're thighs stick together...that's pretty much what it feels like for your man when he tries to enter you when you're not wet.

The most common cause of pain during sex is vaginal dryness.

If you're not wet enough...penetration will start to chafe.

A stinging sensation after sex can mean that you weren't adequately lubricated during sex...resulting in tiny tears along your vaginal wall.

A common cause of vaginal dryness is simply not being aroused enough. That's what it's important to spend time on foreplay before moving on to intercourse.

But it is a myth that if a woman is completely aroused...she will always get really wet and stay that way.

The fact is that you can be turned on and still not get wet enough for comfortable sex. Your body may simply not be able to produce lubrication at a fast enough rate to keep up with the action.

Common causes for lack of lubrication include...

  • Hormones.
  • Medications...even some over-the-counter ones like antihistamines.
  • Being a bit dehydrated.
  • Anxiety...blood vessels constrict when you're anxious...which inhibits lubrication.

With a little extra lube...every touch and thrust will feel smoother and more pleasurable. That extra stimulation will help bring you to orgasm. Because you're wetter...he'll feel more confident...which will inspire him to try new moves and positions.

During foreplay...have your man place a dime-size drop of lube on his fingers before he rubs your clitoris. Since that spot is made up of delicate skin....lubrication will ensure that it doesn't get irritated.

Keep lube nearby so you don't have to interrupt the action to find it.

To Apply Lube

Pour a little in the palms of your hands and rub them together. This also helps to warm both your hands and the lube to body temperature. Now apply with a sensual rub to add to the pleasure of the moment.

The Lube Show

Make a show out of applying the best lubes...

  • Place your hand over his penis with your fingertips resting lightly on his scrotum.
  • Slowly pour lubricant over the back of your hand and let it trickle between your fingers.
  • Place your hands on either side of his testicles and slowly...gently...slide them up all the way to the tip of his penis as you spread the lube.

Even with the best lubes...using too much lube can reduce friction to the point where you barely feel each other. So don't overdo can always add more.

Oil Based Lubricants

Oil based lubricants aren't intended for sexual lubrication. Don't ever use any oil based lubricants such as Vaseline, baby oil or body lotion with latex condoms. They can break down the latex in a condom and cause it to break.

Oil-based products can also increase the likelihood of getting a vaginal infection (vaginitis).

Using oil-based lubes for sex is never a good idea.

Sexual lubrication for condoms makes one...

  • Easier to put on.
  • More comfortable to use.
  • Less likely to break.

Apply lubricant to the outside of a condom to help with penetration and add sensation for the man.

Lubricant should be limited to the reservoir tip of the condom.

Never apply lubricant on the shaft of the penis before applying a condom. The condom could slip off.

The best lubes do NOT contain glycerin. Glycerin is an ingredient in lubes that you want to avoid if you are prone to yeast infections. Especially if it's one of the first three ingredients listed on the package.

When your body breaks down turns into a sugar. Yeast thrives in a sugary environment. Using a lubricant that is high in glycerin is just asking for a yeast infection.

When glycerin is exposed to air it breaks down very quickly. This oxidization creates a very thick and sticky substance that leaves you having to reapply the lube.

Product developers and companies know that if their product gets sticky fast…causing you to have to reapply more often…you will have to buy more product. It's all about money...not quality.

KY Jelly is NOT one of the best lubes. Don't use KY Jelly for sexual lubrication. It isn't good for sex. It's for the insertion of medical instruments...not for the friction of movement. It also has a high level of glycerin.

picture of Super Sex...5 Steps to Explosive Orgasms cover

Don't use warming or stimulating lubes or gels...or anything with menthol. The "stimulation" from these products is due to the irritation of the skin they cause. What is fun or sexy about irritated skin? And some of these are so high in irritants you may have to stop your sexual session altogether…or even make a quick dash to the clinic for treatment. That will definitely kill the mood.

Use a Water Based Lube for
Intercourse and Toys

photo of System Jo H2O water based personal lubricant

One of the best lubes for vaginal intercourse is a water-based lube with like System Jo H20.

Water based lubes...

  • Are safe to use with condoms.
  • Are compatible with all toys.
  • Are safe to use internally.
  • Can get sticky as the water evaporates.
  • Feel more natural and less sticky.
  • Resemble the warmth and wetness of your mouth.

Make sure you use enough lubricant to avoid any chafing or discomfort later.

Your body easily absorbs water-based lube. Water based lube can help re-hydrate your skin.

You may need to reapply the lube a few times during sex. Having a spray bottle of water on hand can help reinvigorate water based lubricant that is starting to feel sticky. A little spray and the slippery ingredients are back in play.

System JO H2O Water Based (2.5 oz. $6) is my favorite basic lubricant.If it dries out a bit during the action you can add water and it gets slippery again.

System JO H2O Water Based...
  • Is latex compatible.
  • Can be used with any kind of toy...even silicone.
  • Washes off easily and doesn't stain.
  • Has no smell or taste.
  • Doesn't get sticky.

System Jo also has a water based line for women with the same features. System JO H2O Women Water Based (2 oz. $7) and System JO Women Premium Personal (8 oz. $13) are similar to each other.

These products are two of the best lubes for sensitive skin. They dry to almost a velvety powdery finish. So you don't wake up slippery or slimy the next morning.

Adding lubricant to any sex toy is sure to increase enjoyment. Check out Super Sex...5 Steps to Explosive Orgasms for some of the latest and greatest sex toys.

Use a Flavored Lube For Fellatio

Discover the best lubes for a perfect blowjob in Fellatio to Blow His Mind...Oral Super Sex .

photo of System Jo Sweet Pomegranate Flavored Lubricant

Lubrication is vital when delivering great oral sex. For giving oral of the best lubes is System Jo Sweet Pomegranate or Banana Lick Flavored Lubricant (5.25 ounces $9). It also comes in Tropical Fruit, Strawberry Kiss, Tangerine Dream and Raspberry Sorbet flavors. It is lightly flavored without sugar or much glycerin...and has no aftertaste.

Most lubricated condoms use a silicone lube because it never dries up. There's no water in no evaporation. I personally don't care for the feel of silicone lube in my mouth...but plain water based lube is also fine for giving your man oral sex.

Drizzle some flavored lube on some places on your man's body you may not have considered before. Then slowly and sensually lick it off. Bring on the excitement as you slather it on. You can say: "I know just where to put this for a taste test."

Don't use flavored lubes in your vagina... either for oral on you or for intercourse. They are sweet and can have glycerin and sugar.

Use a Silicone Lube For Water Resistance

photo of water resistant silicone sexual lubricant

Silicone-based lubricant...

  • Is water-resistant.
  • Is more slippery than water based lube.
  • Lasts longer than water based...because there is no water to dry up.
  • Is safe for use with condoms.
  • Is safe to use internally.
  • Doesn't get sticky.
  • Doesn't cause irritation or allergic reaction.
  • Doesn't breed bacteria or yeast to cause infections.

A silicone based lubricant is one of the best lubes to use where a water based lube would rinse away...such as in the shower.

I like System Jo Premium High Grade Silicone Lubricant (2.5 oz $9). It is the best grade of silicone you can buy. It has no smell or taste and it doesn't get sticky or tacky. And it doesn't stain or clog pores.

Silicone lubricants are not water you may want to wash with soap after using it.

When used internally...your body will naturally clear out the lube...although it may take a bit longer than for a water based lubricant.

See Quickies... When You Don't Have the Time...Aqua Sex for secrets you need to know about sex in the shower.

Don't use silicone-based lubricants with silicone toys. Silicone lubes can slowly degrade the silicone material of the toys.

Silicone-based lubricant is one of the best lubes for anal sex. With or without a will last longer and work better than a water based lube in the anal area.

Use a quality personal lubricant to make sex...

  • Wetter.
  • Longer lasting.
  • Feel better.

Truly yours,

Ella Trudeau

P.S. Do you want to know how to keep your man...and keep him really happy? All my very best secrets on how to do that are here...Secrets to Keep Him.

Copyright 2015, Secrets to Keep Him, All Rights Reserved. By reading this, you agree to all of the following: You understand this to be an expression of opinions and not professional advice. It is only to be used for personal entertainment purposes. You are solely responsible for the use of any of the content and hold Secrets to Keep Him and Ella Trudeau harmless in any event or claim.

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